TRIVIA:
QUOTES:
CHUCKLES/BELLY LAUGHS & GROANERS

TRIVIA:
The Harp is the official Emblem of Ireland, not the Shamrock.  The handheld Harp was played by our Celtic Forefathers.

It was Saint Patrick who made the Shamrock so popular.

The potato"e" Potato is not native to Ireland.  It was originally brought to Ireland from the American Continent.

Ireland is not the only place Gaelic is spoken.  It is also spoken on the Isle of Man, and in Scotland.

The Book of Kells, an ancient illustration of the Bible, is over 1000 years old.  Beside it at Trinity College, Dublin The Book of Durrow.  It was created by Irish Monks.

Over 40% of the United States Presidents had Irish ancestors.

Eamon De Valera was the first President of the Irish Republic.  He was born in Manhattan, New York City.

Hibernia (Latin) and Éire (Gaelic) mean "Ireland".  [i.e.  Ancient Order of Hibernians (AOH)] Irish & Irish-Americans laid the ground work for America's Bridges, Tunnels, and Subways.  Many lost their lives as Sandhogs.

Mike Quill (b.1905, d.1966) born in County Kerry, Ireland was the founding president of the Transport Workers Union of America.  During his tenure the U.S.  labor movement made great strides.

Irish Triads are the arrangement of ideas in groups of three.  Many of these triads are witty, with an amusing climax - or anticlimax - in the third item.

Ceide Fields is the most extensive Stone Age Monument in the world.  It is in, North Mayo, a farming community that is fifty centuries old.

70 Million people, worldwide, can claim Irish ancestry.

St.  Brendan, an Irish Monk, was a 5th century sailor.  It is alleged that he discovered America before Christopher Columbus.

St.  Patrick's Day, the way we celebrate it, is more American than Irish.  In Ireland, St.  Patrick's Day is a religious holiday-shops and businesses are closed to give everyone a day off to be spent with family and friends.

Catholics begin their day by attending Mass.  Families gather for celebratory meals and spend the day at popular sporting events-Gaelic games, championship rugby matches or a steeplechase.  There are big parades in Dublin and Belfast to celebrate national pride.

It is said there are more Americans of Irish descent in America than there are Irishmen in Ireland.  Americans celebrate St.  Patrick's Day with such fun and wild abandon that many people in Ireland tune in their televisions to watch celebrations and parades in the U.S..

The first St.  Patrick's Day celebration in America was in 1737 hosted by the Charitable Irish Society of Boston.  The second was established in 1780 by the Friendly Sons of St.  Patrick in Philadelphia.

It is not known if March 17 is celebrated because it is the date of St.  Patrick's birth or his death.  Some claim it is both, others say neither.  As to St.  Patrick's birthplace, the only definite statement is that he most certainly was not born in Ireland.  He founded 165 churches and started a school with each one.  St.  Patrick is widely acknowledged as the patron saint of Ireland.

There are no snakes in all of Ireland thanks to St.  Patrick.  Of all the legends surrounding this popular figure, the most long-lived is the story of St.  Patrick driving the snakes from Ireland.  As the population of Ireland looked on, St.  Patrick pounded a drum and banished the snakes.

The shamrock is seen everywhere on St.  Patrick's Day.  St.  Patrick used the shamrock when he preached the doctrine of the Trinity as a symbol of its great mystery.  Today, it is widely worn in Ireland and America to celebrate Irish heritage.  In fact, several million shamrock plants are grown in County Cork, Ireland, and shipped all over the world for St.  Patrick's Day.

(Brought to you by the Emerald Society NYCT)

 

QUOTES:
St. Patrick's Day is an enchanted time -- a day to begin transforming winter's dreams into summer's magic.
--Adrienne Cook

This is one race of people for whom psychoanalysis is of no use whatsoever.
 --Sigmund Freud (about the Irish)

Ireland is rich in literature that understands a soul's yearnings, and dancing that understands a happy heart.
--Margaret Jackson

The problem with Ireland is that it’s a country full of genius, but with absolutely no talent.
 --Hugh Leonard

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.
--Alex Levine

O Ireland isn't it grand you look--
Like a bride in her rich adornin?
And with all the pent-up love of my heart
I bid you the top o' the mornin!
--John Locke "The Exile's Return"

Maybe it's bred in the bone, but the sound of pipes is a little bit of heaven to some of us.
--Nancy O'Keeefe

In Ireland the inevitable never happens and the unexpected constantly occurs.
--Sir John Pentland Mahaffy

I'm troubled, I'm dissatisfied. I'm Irish.
--Marianne Moore "Spenser's Ireland"

On she went, and her maiden smile
In safety lighted her round the Green Isle;
And blest forever was she who relied
Upon Erin's honor and Erin's pride.
--Thomas Moore

There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting.
--John Millington Synge
 
 

CHUCKLES & BELLY LAUGHS:

Paddy was found dead in his back yard, and as the weather was a bit on the warm side, the wake was held down to only two days, so his mortal remains wouldn't take a bad turn.  At last his friends laid him in the box, nailed it shut & started down the hill into the churchyard.  As it was a long, sloping path and the mourners were appropriately tipsy, one fellow lurched into the gatepost as they entered the graveyard.  Suddenly a loud knocking came from in the box.  Paddy was alive!  They opened the box up and he sat up, wide eyed, and they all said, Sure, it's a miracle of God!  All rejoiced & they went back and had a few more drinks but later that day, the poor lad died.  Really died.  Stone cold dead.  They bundled him back into his box, and as they huffed and puffed down the hill the next morning, the priest said, "Careful now, boys; mind ye don't bump the gatepost again"

 
 

Pat and Mike were doing some street repairs in front of a known house of ill repute in Boston.  A Jewish Rabbi came walking down the street, looked the left, looked to right, and ducked into the house.  Pat paused a bit from swinging his pick and said "Mike...will you look at that!  A man of the cloth, and going into a place like that in broad daylight!".  A bit later, a Baptist minister came down the street, looked to the left, looked to the right, and scurried into the house.  Mike layed down his shovel, turned to Pat and said "Pat!  Are you seeing what I'm seeing?  A man of the Church, and he's giving that place his custom!"  Just then, a Catholic Priest came down the street, looked to the left, looked to the right, and slipped into the bawdy house.  Pat and Mike straightened up, removed their hats, and Mike says "Faith, and there must be somebody sick in there."

 
 

A young Irishman sat at a pub in the New World drinking beer and conversin' with the barkeep.  Another comes in and sits besides him.  He says how you do and hears the lilt and says you be Irish?  Yes I am.  The first man yells barkeep give us another round and one for my friend here he's from the mother country as well.  The second man asks-so where in the old country ye from.  Dublin responds the first.  Dublin you say - so am I and the second man hollers barkeep bring us another round and a shot of your best Irish Whiskey for me and my friend here.  Afterwards the first man asks from where in Dublin and the second man responds with the street and the first man says well I'll be - so am I and yells barkeep another pair of beers and Irish Whiskey for the pair of us.  The phone behind the bar rings and the barkeep answers it.  The owner of the pub asks - how is business.  The barkeep responds - not too bad - The O'Malley twins are here getting drunk again.

 

GROANERS:

 

His wife had been killed in an accident and the police were questioning Finnegan.  "Did she say anything before she died?" asked the sergeant.  "She spoke without interruption for about forty years," said the Irishman.

 
 
 

Man runs out of a West Belfast pub with his arms on fire Police catch him and charge him with having an armalite.

 
 

Irishman went to a pet shop and asked how many budgies were in stock.  "We have 99" replied the shop owner.  "Give us the lot" said the Irish man, paid for them and left.  He went to a tailors shop and had 99 pockets sewn into a jacket, put a budgie in each pocket, went up to the Post Office Tower and jumped off.  He hit the ground with an almighty smack and lay there groaning until a passer-by came and asked him what had happened.  "I don't know sur" he replied "but that's the last time I try that budgie jumping"

 
 

Irishman finds a Genie lamp and rubs it.  Out comes the Genie and asks "Master you have released me from the lamp and I grant you three wishes, what would you like?"  Irishman scratches his head, then answers "A bottle of Guinness that never gets empty.  "Granted master" retorted the Genie and produced the bottle.  The man was delighted and got drunk on this one magic Guiness bottle for weeks then he remembered that he had two other wishes.  He rubbed the lamp again and the Genie appeared.  "Yes master, you have two more wishes, what would you like?"  "You know that magic, never ending Guinness bottle" he asks the Genies.  "Well, for my final two wishes, I'd like another two of them"

 
 

A drunk gets on a bus and asks the conductor how long the trip is between Limerick to Cork.  "About 2 hours," says the conductor.  "Okay," says the drunk "then how long is the trip between Cork to Limerick?"  The irate conductor says to the drunk "It's still about 2 hours, man.  Why'd ya think there'd be a difference?"  "Well," says the drunk, "It's only a week between Christmas and New Year's, but it's a helluva long time between New Year's to Christmas!"

 
 

The Irish attempt on Mount Everest was a valiant effort, but it failed:  They ran out of scaffolding.  Then there was the Irishman who sued the local baker for forging the Irishman's signature on a hot cross bun....  What are the best ten years of an Irishman's life?  Third grade.  How do you sink an Irish submarine?  Knock on the hatch.  The first Irish National Steeplechase was finally abandoned.  Not one horse could get a descent footing on the cathedral roof.  Concerning bagpipes:  The Irish invented them and gave them to the Scots as a joke, and the Scots haven't seen the joke yet.  Did you hear about the Irishman who was tap dancing?  He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.  How can you identify an Irish pirate?  He's the one with patches over both eyes.

 

SEND EMAIL PLEASE

	HOME PAGE KCNET NEWSLETTER
	COMMENTARY AND CLASS SCHEDULE PAGE MIKE'S COMMENTARY, SCHEDULE OF KCNET CLASSES,  NEWS & NOTES BY SUE FOUST
	TECHNICAL PAGE TECHNICALLY SPEAKING, VIRUS AND OTHER STINKY STUFF, INTERESTING SITES
	KCNET SENIORCENTER.NET HOME PAGE NEWSLETTER ARCHIVES 2005, 2004, 2003, & 2002 KCNET NEWSLETTER MEMBER PAGES