SENIOR NET NEWSLETTER 06/25/2000
THIS WEEK'S SCHEDULE: Tuesday 6/27/00 @9:00 AM Tuesday Newbies (third session of six sessions) This is a very basic course in computer techniques for the internet. Attendees may start this week also. There is a $12.00 per course charge for this class. Class size is limited so participants should pre register. Skills taught in the beginner classes include mouse techniques like drag and drop, plus very beginner basics for email and browsing the Web. Dave Winkelman provides the leadership for this class. It is not necessary for attendees to have their own computers but it is very difficult to retain information without practice. You really would not try to learn to play the piano with out actual keyboard time.
CLICK HERE to go to the where am I pictures!
INTERESTING SITES: Check the status of "OUR ANGEL" actually she is a beautiful Rag Doll cat residing with Jane and Jesse Long. She is up to her Rag Doll Beautiful Blue Eyes in a heated contest for "Cutest Pet." She has ten votes to date probably five of them Jane's and five of them mine. It is permissible to vote once each week. So I guess she has more actual supporters than Jane and me. You can help Angel by accessing Petsmart and voting in her favor. www.rascalsangel.pages.petsmart.com/index.html
While I'm in a voting mood I'll submit this one for beauty. It is called "Jack's Little Corner" but he has a number of sites all of which are outstanding in the aesthetic sense. The music is enjoyable but the "Lake Effect" graphics are some of the best I've seen. In fact Jack has six other personal sites clickable from this page. IMHO Jack's sites are eyeball soothing and well worth the surf. http://members.xoom.com/_XMCM/kcaj22/index.html
Here is this weeks Senior Site Med Site. I suggested this site many moons ago. It is worth recommending again. It features many doctors and is a great search engine. Remember that old TV Ad? "If Mikie likes it... Try it you'll like it. www.netwellness.org/
A relative of extreme importance to me, son Dave Foust, stumbled onto Jim Rymell. He was using classmates.com and found him. It is apparent that he has great memories from this area. So if you have been wondering what in the world has happened to Jim Rymell or if you are interested in Model railroading you will want to access Jim's homepage. www.geocities.com/CapeCanaveral/Hangar/2434/
If you are interested in other classmates you might find them registered at classmates.com. You can register, search, and email access any classmate that has registered free of fee. However, a nominal fee is requested for in-depth searches. www.classmates.com/index.tf
Here's a site to send to your Soccer, Little League, Pop Warner Football offspring coach or parent. Why is ETeamz one of the fastest growing sports sites on the Internet? Because instead of focusing its efforts on a few dozen professional teams, it has opened its doors to little leagues, high schools, and weekend softball teams across the nation. This amateur sports virtual community connects coaches, players, leagues, and fans. Anyone with a team can build a free Web page, complete with schedules, standings, player rosters, directions, news, weather, message boards, and photos. You don't even have to know the first thing about designing Web pages. ETeamz has created a Web site building wizard that walks you through the whole process. The Tips & Drills section will turn anyone into a coach in a matter of minutes. And there's even a handy locator for local clinics, tournaments, and camps. www.eteamz.com
This site features "The Senility Prayer" and I say "Right on Brother." Thanks to Tom Livingston for this one. There is a nice background, good music and some interesting reading. www.angelfire.com/ga/sweetgeorgiapeach/senility.html
The fun sites: www.send4fun.com/summerp.htm www.justsaywow.com/itshot.htm www.justsaywow.com/elephantjokes.htm www.justsaywow.com/summer.htm www.justsaywow.com/thankstoyou.htm
BUSH TALKS TECH TO ZDNET We all know that Al Gore invented the "Internet" but he isn't the only political who has an Internet opinion. George Bush, the GOP presidential hopeful said government's laissez-faire attitude should stop short of ignoring citizens' privacy concerns. Hopefully ZDNET will have an interview with the DEM presidential hopeful for our view comparison. One must maintain non-biased objectivity in such accounts. www.zdnet.com/zdnn/stories/news/0,4586,2591261,00.html?chkpt=zdnn062100
I know just what you're thinking: "What might a leather coat have in common with the origin of this expression?" Well I'll tell you. Return with me now to the past. We're in a medieval dungeon. The prisoner won't confess, so the jailer has to use, er, persuasion. The interrogator chooses to make use of a device borrowed from leather tanners to stretch a hide: the rack. With wrists pulled one way and ankles the other, it's a stretch to believe that the prisoner can go long without talking. Now back to your brain. When you "rack" it for something, you're torturing it. You have ways of making it talk, and it WILL talk! Source: WHY YOU SAY IT by Webb Garrison
FAST FACTS: After Albert Einstein died in 1955, his brain went to Kansas. It ended up in "America's Breadbasket" because pathologist Dr. Thomas Harvey, who autopsied the great mathematician, was authorized by Einstein's son to keep the brain for study. Harvey kept it in a bottle in a cardboard box behind a beer cooler. Pretty risky. What if some lab assistants working late one night broke open a couple of brewskies and, being hungry as well as thirsty, mistook the brain for headcheese? Source: STRANGE STORIES, AMAZING FACTS OF AMERICA'S PAST
IN ASTRONOMY, WHAT IS A WHITE DWARF? The dense, burned-out remains of a star; a stellar corpse.
THE HIGHEST SURFACE WIND SPEED EVER RECORDED WAS AT MOUNT WASHINGTON, NEW HAMPSHIRE, ON APRIL 24, 1934. WHAT WAS IT? It was 231 miles per hour. (Winds become hurricane force when they reach 74 miles per hour.)
HOW MANY LETTERS ARE THERE IN THE HAWAIIAN ALPHABET? Twelve: vowels A-E-I-O-U; consonants: H-K-L-M-N-P-W.
WHAT DO WORKERS IN THE MANGROVE FORESTS OF WEST BENGAL, INDIA WEAR TO PROTECT THEMSELVES FROM TIGER ATTACKS? Rubber masks tied to the back of their heads - because tigers are known to attack humans only from behind.
HOW MANY DIAMONDS ARE THERE ON BRITAIN'S IMPERIAL STATE CROWN, WHICH IS WORN BY THE REIGNING MONARCH ON STATE OCCASIONS? There are 1,783 - including the 309-carat Star of Africa. The crown also has 277 pearls, 17 sapphires, 11 emeralds, and 5 rubbies.
WHAT POLITICAL PARTY EMBLEM WAS THE FIRST TO BE USED ON A NATIONAL FLAG? The Nazi's swastika. The black swastika in a circle of white on red background was introduced as the banner of Germany's National Socialist Party in 1919; it became the flag of the Third Reich in 1935.
WHAT MAMMAL HAS THE HEAVIEST BRAIN? The sperm whale. Its brain weighs up to 20 pounds - six times heavier than a human's.
"Fear is nature's warning signal to get busy." --Henry Link
"No life is so hard that you can't make it easier by the way you take it." --Ellen Glasgow
The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need more supervision. --Lynn Lavner
An unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the bad ones. --William Somerset Maugham
Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house. -- Jean Kerr
THIS WEEK'S CUTIES:
This first set is from Bob and Donna Yoxtheimer via Bud Casselberry. Some quips belong in the catagory "From the mouths of babes."
Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked.
An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead."
A police recruit was asked during the exam,"What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?" He said,"Call for backup."
A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissed them to go to church, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" Annie replied, "Because people are sleeping."
A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem. A small child replied: "They couldn't get a baby-sitter."
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and said, Johnny what is the matter? Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife."
A very dirty little fellow came in from playing in the yard and asked his mother, "Who am I? " Ready to play the game she said, "I don't know! Who are you?" "WOW!" cried the child. "Mrs. Johnson was right! She said I was so dirty, my own mother wouldn't recognize me!"
A wise school teacher sends this note to all parents on the first day of school: "If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school, I'll promise not to believe everything he says happens at home."
Bud had a big hand in this one too. PAUL REVERE'S MOTHER: "I don't care where you think you have to go, young man. Midnight is past your curfew!"
MARY, MARY, QUITE CONTRARY'S MOTHER: "I don't mind you having a garden, Mary, but does it have to be growing under your bed?"
MONA LISA'S MOTHER: "After all that money your father and I spent on braces, Mona, that's the biggest smile you can give us?"
HUMPTY DUMPTY'S MOTHER: "Humpty, If I've told you once, I've told you a hundred times not to sit on that wall. But would you listen to me? Noooo!"
COLUMBUS' MOTHER: "I don't care what you've discovered, Christopher. You still could have written!"
BABE RUTH'S MOTHER: "Babe, how many times have I told you -- quit playing ball in the house! That's the third broken window this week!"
MICHELANGELO'S MOTHER: "Mike, can't you paint on walls like other children? Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"
NAPOLEON'S MOTHER: "All right, Napoleon. If you aren't hiding your report card inside your jacket, then take your hand out of there and prove it!"
CUSTER'S MOTHER: "Now, George, remember what I told you -- don't go biting off more than you can chew!"
ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER: "Again with the stovepipe hat, Abe? Can't you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"
BARNEY'S MOTHER: "I realize strained plums are your favorite,Barney, but you're starting to look a little purple."
MARY'S MOTHER: "I'm not upset that your lamb followed you to school, Mary, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you."
BATMAN'S MOTHER: "It's a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the insurance is going to be?"
GOLDILOCKS' MOTHER: "I've got a bill here for a busted chair from the Bear family. You know anything about this, Goldie?"
LITTLE MISS MUFFET'S MOTHER: "Well, all I've got to say is if you don't get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room, there'll be a lot more spiders around here!"
ALBERT EINSTEIN'S MOTHER: "But, Albert, it's your senior picture. Can't you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse,something...?"
GEORGE WASHINGTON'S MOTHER: "The next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!"
JONAH'S MOTHER: "That's a nice story, but now tell me where you've really been for the last three days."
SUPERMAN'S MOTHER: "Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we've decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending so much time in all those phone booths?"
THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER: "Of course I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb, Thomas. Now turn off that light and get to bed!"
You are hooked if... You have ever sent E-mail to someone sitting next to you. You have ever had a dream involving computers. You have ever modified an ini file. You would sell your grandmother for more bandwidth. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. You get up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop to check your E-mail on your way back to bed. You've entered that USR X2 contest so many times you get e-mail saying "Forget it, you are not going to win, just go buy the modem". You know what the USR X2 contest is. If you have ever dozed off while at the computer. Have ever e-mailed yourself . The tech support folks at your ISP call YOU for the tough ones. You have more than one copy of the same version of software on your machine. You have ever submitted a tip to windows95.com. You have ever chatted with someone while talking to them onthe phone. You are surprised that there are other real foods besides pizza.
I'll remember this one when I schedule the trip to the airport to get Sue this evening. The passengers were leaving the plane after landing, and one smiling, satisfied passenger paused to congratulate the flight attendant. "Stewardess," he said happily, "I want to compliment you and the crew and especially the captain for getting here right on time. It's not often that an airline gets to where it's going exactly when they claim it will. I'm going to call your home office and let them know how pleased I am." "Why, thank you, sir," the flight attendant answered, "but I think you should know--this is yesterday's flight."
And That's All Folks!! I hope you enjoyed this communication and can attend one or more of the sessions scheduled for this week.
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