SENIOR NET NEWSLETTER 04/30/2000

Wow! It's almost May. In fact we are just about done earning the "fair share" portion of our incomes for next year's donation to the taxing governments. Yes, in a few days we can officially begin spending this year's money on the things we want and need.
It sure is nice these days.  Grass is green and long.  Dandelions are blooming.  So are many fruit trees, smelly viburnums, lilacs, tulips, etc.  Would you believe that some folks are pushing their gardens?  Migrating birds are arriving and doing their spring thing.   Some have already done their spring thing and quietly departed.  Many will spend the summer with us.  The morning and night sounds seem to change each new day.  Spring is a wonderful season.
So, enough philosophising. On to the meat of this epistle.
 

   THIS WEEK'S SCHEDULE:
Tuesday 5/2/00 @9:00 AM
Tuesday Newbies (second session of six sessions)
There is still room for more participants. This is a very basic course in computer techniques for the internet. Skills taught in the
beginner classes include mouse techniques like drag and drop, plus very beginner basics for email and browsing the Web.
Mike Foust will provide the leadership for this class.
It is not necessary for attendees to have their own computers but it sure helps with the learning curve.

Tuesday 5/2/00 @1:00 PM
CREATE WEB PAGES
A lot for you and help for KCnet but this class is not for everyone. Participants will explore Web Page Development by
creating their own page, developing and maintaining the www.seniorcenter.net pages and create other pages for KCnet.
Last week we had a lot of help from KCnet web page designers Chris Glantz and and Jennie Andrews.  They really know their stuff and can they ever type fast.  My keyboard was smoking when the class was over.  The techniques used to do Home Pages require the very basic understanding of Window techniques like saving files, creating folders, copy, paste, etc. in addition to the challenges of HTML (Hyper Text Markup Language).  Participants should understand and be able to perform tasks like saving files, creating folders, cut, copy, paste, etc. with a minimum of assistance.
So if you have a flair for creativity, able to type, want to create a personal home page, willing to be frustrated, and want to
learn and contribute labor this is the class to wander into.

Tuesday 5/2/00 @5:00 PM
Tuesday Evening Newbies (third session of six sessions)
The next Tuesday Evening Newbie class for beginners is scheduled to start 5/30/00. There will be a $12.00 charge for this class. Class size is limited. Interested participants should pre register. This is a very basic course in computer techniques for the internet. Skills taught in the beginner classes include mouse techniques like drag and drop, plus very beginner basics for email and browsing the Web. Dave Winkleman provides the leadership for this class.
It is not necessary for attendees to have their own computers but it sure helps with the learning curve.

Wednesday 5/3/00 @9:00 AM
Wednesday group of Senior Net Learners: We had a bunch of  new attendees from the Intermediate Group that
finished their final session weeks ago.  They jumped right into the scheme of the free flowing class.  New participants are always welcome. It is not necessary for attendees to have their own computers but it sure helps with the learning curve. Mike Foust will provide the leadership for this session.
Intermediate computer knowledge and Intermediate computer skills are necessary.

Wednesday 5/3/00 @ 1:00 PM
Wednesday Newbies (fifth session of six sessions)
We cannot accept any new participants for this class.  The next Wednesday afternoon Newbies begins  May 17, 2000.
Pre registration is open for this class.  There will be a $12.00 per course charge for this class. Class size is limited, so interested participants should pre register. This is a very basic course in computer techniques for the internet. Skills taught in the beginner classes include mouse techniques like drag and drop, plus very beginner basics for email and browsing the Web. Mike Foust will provide the leadership for this class.
It is not necessary for attendees to have their own computers but it sure helps with the learning curve.

Thursday 5/4/00 @ 9:00 AM
Thursday Intermediates (second session of six sessions)
This class is full.   Some topics to be addressed include: Basics of maneuvering about the Windows Operating System,
copy/paste, drag/drop, editing, saving to various drives, right mouse button options, creating folders and files, uninstalling,
deleting, advanced email and browser techniques involving bookmarks, address books, forwarding messages, attachments,
and HTML (Hyper Text Markup Language).  Last week we learned how the Hard Drive is organized, how to change the desktop, and make shortcuts for the desktop. I'll bet that there are at least 24 machines with new looks.
The atmosphere is light and the learning is bodacious!! Sound like fun? Lots of demonstrating and "hands on" -- the
computers.
Mike Foust will provide the leadership for this session.  Volunteers Tom Livingston and BJ Miller help with the hands on part of the sessions. Beginner computer knowledge and beginner computer skills are necessary
A ton of info is packed into the six sessions.
 




You might want to check with the KCnet desk for other classes scheduled for this spring.  There are a BUNCH OF 'EM.



INTERESTING SITES:
Check out fellow classmates' newly created web pages.   I know you will enjoy the graphics, music, and the messages.  Katie has a special mouse trail.  Take a bow.  Great jobs, all of them.
Katie Carr features square dance information. http://www.kcnet.org/~ccarr/katie.html
John and Kitty Laubscher feature their home, pets and gardens.   http://www.kcnet.org/~jjlaubsc/whipporwillmountain.html
Peg Masden features a local painting group.  http://www.kcnet.org/~pmasden/Decorative.html
Ruth Bills features her family.  http://www.kcnet.org/~rbills/RuthPage.html
Jane Long, Bert Rice, Don Miller, and some others are there too but I do not know their addresses.  Maybe I can feature them next week

Last week we learned how to bathe a cat.  The teacher was "The Dog"  This week "The Cat," still very clean,  gets revenge.
www.justsaywow.com/telltheweather.htm

This Senior Site is about the best I have seen.  You may want to register for their email newsletter.
www.seniornet.org

I'll bet most of you saw the keester card floating about this Easter season but here it is with a midi file that is a knock out.
Give it time to load.  Thanks Bobbi Way.
passthison.com/keester/?exit=no

Here is a neat card site.  They have a lot of humerous cards.  The flasher series is a hoot. The upcoming Martha Stewart parody cards will be side splitter.
www.OhMyGoodness.com

Thanks to a gaggle of readers for these just say wow suggestions.
www.justsaywow.com/addicted.htm
www.justsaywow.com/manwants.htm
www.justsaywow.com/morning.htm
www.justsaywow.com/abc2.htm
www.justsaywow.com/badday.htm

Here is a dynamite smiley site compliments of Jack Frey. You will want to click on Jill's Jubilee of fun and Laughs link at the bottom of the page.
earth.vol.com/~jkapicu//passiton.html

CELEBHOO
Can't find information about your favorite celebrity on theWeb? Well, maybe you're just looking in the wrong place.  Celebhoo is a Yahoo-like directory that contains Web sites about actors, models, musicians, authors, and athletes. There's
even a "newswire" of celebrity gossip culled from reputable outlets like E! Online and Billboard magazine. Once you've
gawked at hundreds of photos and know the celebrity's life story, then perhaps it's time to send your favorite celeb an email. Feel free to consult Celebhoo's dubious directory of email addresses, but just don't lose any sleep waiting for a reply.
www.celebhoo.com

This week's Special Search Engine.
Audio Places is a meta-search site for sounds. It looks through more than two-dozen sites and sound-search engines to find the MP3 or other files you want.
www.audioplaces.com/

Last but not least the Coca Cola site.  Thanks to John Simcox.  This one is neat and should cause salivating by any web page designer.
www.cocacola.com/gateway.html
That list oughtta keep us busy for a week or so.

Something to think about!! Thanks to Jim Rockwell for this site
If the world were 100 people
There would be:
57 Asians
21 Europeans
14 from North and South America
8 Africans
52 would be female
48 would be male
70 would be nonwhite, 30 white
59% of the entire world's wealth would belong to only 6 people
and all 6 would be citizens of the United States
80 would live in substandard housing
70 would be unable to read
50 would suffer from malnutrition
1 would be near death
1 would be near birth
Only 1 would have a college education
99 of them will not see this message, because only 1 would have a computer.
When one considers our world from such a compressed perspective, the need for both acceptance, and understanding becomes glaringly apparent.
WOW-Aren't we fortunate???
Visit http://www.justsaywow.com/100people.htm  There are good graphics and a nice midi to accompany the message, plus you can send the site to friends.

DIDJA  KNOW?:
Why do we call nonsense talk a lot of "rigmarole?"
Like the word "gobbledygook," rigmarole sounds like what it describes. Each means nonsense talk or writing and rigmarole
is also applied to procedures--often bureaucratic--that don't make sense. But while gobbledygook was coined by a Texas
congressman, rigmarole has a pedigree.
The word evolved from "Ragman Roll," a legal scroll related to medieval pledges of loyalty to the English king by the Scottish nobles. Even then nobody was supposed to understand legalese, so the language on this scroll just rolled along through obscurity. A French party game involving the use of a scroll likely also have played a role in the etymology of rigmarole as a nonsense name.
Source: A BROWSER'S DICTIONARY by John Ciardi

HOW MUCH IS THE HUMAN BODY WORTH?
Newspaper columnists and others have claimed that the body's chemical worth is between 98 cents and $5. But one doctor
argues that, at the rates currently charged by large chemical distributors, the body's worth is at least $169,834 - not counting $1,200 worth of blood. The key is to market the body's products intelligently and not reduce them to basic elements like carbon and zinc.

People did not use soap to clean themselves until the eighteenth century.

No wonder world population started to grow substantially at that time.  People were finally willing to live close to other people!
Source: DO FISH DRINK WATER?

QUOTES:
There's a statistical theory that if you gave a million monkeys typewriters and set them to work, they'd eventually come up with the complete works of Shakespeare. Thanks to the Internet, we now know this isn't true.
      -Ian Hart, British actor

Money is like an arm or a leg - use it or lose it.
     -Henry Ford

We are new every day.
     -Irene Claremont de Castillego

THIS WEEK'S CUTIES:
I think Don Miller is responsible for this one.
Two elderly women were out driving in a large car-both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through.  The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light".
After a few more minutes they came to another intersection and the light was red again and again they went right though. This time the woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it.  She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention to the road and the next intersection to see what was going on. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through and she turned to the other woman and said,
"Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row!  You  could have killed us!"
Mildred turned to her and said "Oh my God, am I driving?

Bud Casselberry sent this one.
Apologies to any blondes who may be defensive.
Three blondes died and are at the pearly gates of heaven.  St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question.
St. Peter asks the first blonde, "What is Easter?"
The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy! It's the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful..."
"Wrong!" replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second blonde the same question, "What is Easter?"
The second blonde replies, "Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and
celebrate the birth of Jesus."
St. Peter looks at the second blonde, shakes his head in disgust, tells her she's wrong, and then peers over his glasses at the third blonde and asks,
"What is Easter?"
The third blonde smiles confidently and looks St. Peter in the eyes, "I know what Easter is."
"Oh?" says St. Peter, incredulously.
"Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover.  Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and Jesus was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples.  The Romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and was hung on a cross with nails through his hands.  He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder."
St. Peter smiles broadly with delight.
The third blonde continues,  "Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out and, if he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter."

By the time a Marine pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken.
"You've got to have a room somewhere," he pleaded. "Or just a bed, I don't care where."
"Well, I do have a double room with one occupant, a Navy guy," admitted the manager, "and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I'm not sure it'd
be worth it to you."
"No problem," the tired Marine assured him. "I'll take it."
The next morning the Marine came down to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. "How'd you sleep?" Asked the manager.
"Never better."
The manager was impressed. "No problem with the other guy snoring, then?"
"Nope, I shut him up in no time." Said the Marine.
"How'd you manage that?" asked the manager.
"He was already in bed, snoring away, when I came in the room," the Marine explained. "I went over, gave him a kiss on
the cheek, said, 'Goodnight, beautiful,' and he sat up all night watching me."

I hope you enjoyed this communication and can attend one or more of the sessions scheduled for this week.

Mail Mike