I thought it might be nice to start off the Newsletter a bit different this week. I'm passing along some "Thoughts For The Day" that I copied from a place mat that I used when breakfasting at the "Country Cupboard" outside of Lewisburg, Pa. Just in case you have not ventured there, I urge you to put it high on your list of to-do's. The Country Cupboard is the HOME OF THE BEST WARM STICKIES IN THE WHOLE WORLD. They are made fresh all the time and available for take out. Get lots of napkins because the good gooey warm juices drip off your elbows when you bend your arms to feed your face. They have to be sinful because they taste too good. Hey, they have a nice Country store and gift center in addition to just darn good ho-made food Oh and those Stickies of course. So if you like to sneak a little non-harm sinning, a couple of those stickie buns is a good way to do it.
THIS WEEK'S SCHEDULE: Tuesday 3/21/00 @9:00 AM Tuesday Newbies (second session of six sessions) This class is full. The next Tuesday Newbie class for beginners is scheduled to begin 4/25/00. The next Wednesday Newbies class starts April 5. There will be a $12.00 per course charges for these classes. Class size is limited. Interested participants should pre register. This is a very basic course in computer techniques for the internet. Skills taught in the beginner classes include mouse techniques like drag and drop, plus very beginner basics for email and browsing the Web. Mike Foust will provide the leadership for this class. It is not necessary for attendees to have their own computers but it sure helps with the learning curve.
OFFICE TO OFFICE: Looking for a politician? Several sites have great lists of who's where, and what they've been voting on. Thomas is a service of the Library of Congress (and named for Thomas Jefferson). Congress.org has directories of all the branches of government and lets you search by state or Zip code to see who is representing you right now. CapWeb calls itself The Internet Guide to Congress. thomas.loc.gov www.congress.org www.capweb.net Here is a link for the State Politicals. State Legislators Here is a link for Local Politicals (County, City, Townships). Local Politicals
PET EDUCATION Drs. Foster and Smith are two net-savvy vets who have created an excellent site covering all aspects of your pet's health (assuming, of course, that your pet is either a dog or a cat!). Read up on parasites, nutrition, and allergies. Consult the dictionary of veterinary terms, so you can actually talk to your vet. Just imagine, never having to ask what Anthelmintic means again! There's even a quiz where you can test your Pet IQ (but not your pet's IQ, unfortunately). www.peteducation.com
Here are two domains that keep adding neat stuff every day. Thanks to Barb Miller, Tom Livingston, Jack Frey, and Linda Frye. www.justsaywow.com/abc.htm www.justsaywow.com/doggieforsale.htm www.lovethissite.com/man/
WHAT IS THE OLDEST REGISTERED FOOD TRADEMARK STILL IN USE IN THE UNITED STATES? The red devil on the cans of Underwood's deviled ham. It dates back to 1866.
WHAT ARE THE ODDS OF HAVING AN EAR OF CORN WITH AN ODD NUMBER OF ROWS OF KERNELS? Zero. There are always an even number of rows.
WHAT DID LONDON BLACKSMITH CHARLES MONCKE INVENT? The monkey wrench, which was originally called Moncke's wrench.
HOW DID THE DUFFEL BAG GET ITS NAME? From the Belgian town of Duffel, where the coarse, thicknapped woolen fabric used for the bags was manufactured.
WHAT ID THE ORIGIN OF THE WORD HOAX? It is believed to be a contraction of "hocus," from the expression hocus pocus.
WHERE WAS ADOLF HITLER'S SISTER-IN-LAW WORKING DURING WORLD WAR II? For British War Relief in New York City. Bridget Hitler was the Irish-born wife of Hitler's older half-brother, Alois.
Life without a friend is death without a witness. -- Spanish Proverb
It is enough that I am of value to somebody today. -- Hugh Prather
THIS WEEK'S CUTIES: Posted on a sign outside Shoen's restaurant in Jersey Shore: Thanks to Bert Rice for sending this one. Son of a Bush or Gore more years
Little People and the things they say: These are a hoot. Thanks to Bud Casselberry and Judy Garner. One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't, dear,"she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy's room." A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."
A mother took her three-year-old daughter to church for the first time. The church lights were lowered, and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying lighted candles. All was quiet until the little one started to sing in a loud voice, Happy birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you...
A child came home from Sunday school and told his mother that he had learned a new song about a cross-eyed bear named Gladly. It took his mother a while before she realized that the hymn was really, "Gladly The Cross I'd Bear,"
A four-year-old Catholic boy was playing with a 4-year-old Protestant girl in a plastic wading pool in the back yard. They splashed a lot of water on each other; their clothes were soaking wet, so they decided to take off the wet clothes. The little boy looked at the little girl and said, "I didn't know there was that much difference between Catholics and Protestants!"
It was that time during the Sunday morning service for "the children's sermon," and all the children were invited to come forward. One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said to her, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter dress?" The little girl replied, directly into the pastor's clip-on microphone, yes, and my Mom says it's a Bitch to iron."
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child, I was told if I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Bobby looked up and replied, "Well, Ms Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."
The preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike, and as he preached, he moved briskly about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. Then he moved to one side, getting wound up in the cord and nearly tripping before jerking it again. After several circles and jerks, a little girl in the third pew leaned toward her mother and whispered, "If he gets loose, will he hurt us?"
A father was reading Bible stories to his young son. He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." His son asked, "What happened to the flea?"
A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother, "There were 2 boy kittens and 2 girl kittens." How did you know?" his mother asked. "Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," he replied. "I think it's printed on the bottom."
A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, "Let my brothers havethe first pancake. I can wait." Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus."
A father was at the beach with his children when his four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore, where a seagull lay dead in the sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked. "He died and went to Heaven," the dad replied. The boy thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him back down?"
A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered. The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"
A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's artwork. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "but no one knows what God looks like. Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
I hope you enjoyed this communication and can attend one of the sessions scheduled for this week.
THE SCHEDULE INTERESTING SITES
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